Childfree Women

Nobody understands when a woman says she doesn't want children. It is passed over as her not finding the right man as yet, her biological clock just isn't ticking yet, or she's just going through a phase. It seems most people believe that women should have babies simply because god gave them the plumbing to do it. It is also seen as a strange thing for a woman to be married and still not desire a child. Some women, however, just don't want to have children. Children are a major responsibility with questionable benefits, so some person choose not to burden themselves with this responsibility. Some women may not even think of it as a burden, but simply have no desire towards making babies.

People assume that there is only one path to life, education, job, marriage, children, die. When I was only a wee teenager I realized just how boring that sequence could be and decided to take another route on my way to death (since we're all living to die). That path has come to be about travelling, learning about different cultures, working and living in various countries, writing and researching, among others. That plan has no room for family house mortgage, mini van or expelling large objects from my body that make me ill during and after pregnancy.

Now, it may not be easy to see how a baby would poop on my seemingly flexibly plans, but let me provide some enlightenment. A 2014 Huffington post article by Emily Thomas stated that raising a child in the US from age zero to 17 costs approximately US$304,000 . Consider the delivery of a child alone, that's easily US$10,000. That's over a million Japanese yen. That would significantly cut into my budget for eating, drinking tea and travelling to two three countries per year. In fact, it may eliminate any such plans whatsoever. This is just a monetary issue though, so if you are rich, that won't be an issue. The thing is though, how many people are rich enough to take three vacations per year to exotic places like greenland, Palau, South Africa and still maintain a child? Even without a child in the picture, I would have to work really hard to achieve my travel dreams, so imagine, having an extra plane seat to pay for and other child related expenses. 

Consider my desire to work in various countries. Again, I would need to consider international schools that are usually expensive. Think of the child's well being. Would a child be happy going from school to school just because of her mother's busy life? I don't think so. That may lead to mental problems in a child, learning problems, mental disorders due to not enough family times and no close network of friends, since he/she never spends enough time in one location to make any real friends.

Another thing, if a woman doesn't want children, she probably isn't overflowing with maternal instincts. She would probably suffer serious depression if she were forced into a situation where she had to have a child. Given the hardships experienced by pregnant women and mothers, a woman should be mentally ready to sacrifice her body, money and time for the child. Otherwise, she will probably be miserable and lose interest in her own life. That kind of thing is what leads to crazy mothers killing their babies and sometimes killing themselves too.

Source of the cost of raising a child: Huffington Post article by Emily Thomas: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/18/cost-of-raising-a-child_n_5688179.html

Guam - a well kept secret

There is a little island in the pacific called Guam. It's a well kept secret. The island can be driven around in a matter of hours. With a bicycle, it could take a whole day. A whole day! :). The island is small, but not lacking in things to do. Driving around the island is easy and seemed safe to me. I took some pictures of things that grabbed my attention while I was there.

Pictures of Guam

 An amazingly beautiful flower that I don't know the name of.

 Apparently worm and cricket snacks are eaten in Guam :o

Everyone loves Jamaican food! I found this Jamaican restaurant with at least 3 outlets.

 Splashing dashing restless sea, never still you seem to be.. (Extract from the poem by Cecily E. Pike)

 The beautiful flower again

 and again...

 Popping colours, almost neon

 Such a serene day. Perfect for rowing a boat, so I did a little sea canoeing :)

 Can you guess what this is?  A foot and a hand! Plus some interesting looking seaweed.

 Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. "The lamp of the body is the eye. If therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light." Matthew 6:22

 An interesting art piece.

 The perfect view

Watching the para-sailors from afar and wishing I could join.

Spring Flowers

As the title suggests, in spring lots of flowers spring to life. The landscape pops with lively colours and so does my overall mood. With that said, I completely understand now why Japanese make such an event out of cherry blossom watching. At first, I thought it was also strange to have a word for it 'hanami', but after enduring a dull, gloomy and cold winter, spring reminds us that we really are alive and it reminds us that winter will always end. A brighter day will always come and we can always sit still and observe the beauty of life or sit beneath sakura trees and picnic all day. 

Sakura trees aren't the only blossoms that Japanese love to look at though. Plum 'ume' blossoms are also a treat. They bloom earlier in March and pull out big crowds who go to gardens to view their beauty. In fact, I went to a garden recently that had plum blossoms in grand style. They were spectacular. A friend of mine calls the views surreal and I agree with him. The landscape in this country is just amazing. Here are a few pics from my recent plum blossom viewing. 

 People came out in droves to see the plum blossoms. The blossoms must really feel appreciated :).

 The pink and white road with the lovely flowery scent of plum blossoms.

 Getting a close up with this beauty.

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These weeping trees are so splendid in all their pink glory. The petals on the ground create a magical scene.

 Another close up 

Three colours, all in one shot! Yatta!

 Look what I found, early blooming Sakura (cherry blossoms)
!      

The weeping forest, well, not quite a forest.

On the other side of the plum blossom garden were Camellia flowers (tsubaki - in Japanese). 

 A nice spread of Camellia on the soft, green moss.

 Just lovely.

 A hybrid!

Photographing the photographer :)

These babies were so stubborn. They just would not move with the flow and go downstream. Apparently they're 'upstreamers' ;)

My big step

Less than four years ago I quit my job in a prestigious institution , packed my suitcases and migrated to another country.

Gaining the opportunity to travel to this country was such a privilege that I didn't think twice about quitting my job, which by the way, had a few benefits and didn't pay half bad. My father tried to caution me against my decision, but there was just no stopping me. For me, there was really nothing to think about. I was being given an all expenses paid opportunity of a lifetime and I was going to take it.

Looking back now, I still believe that I made the right choice. I've written about 6 academic papers in less than four years, traveled all over Asia, learnt a functional level of Japanese, gained a bucket load of life lessons, maintained a stable, loving relationship for a few years, gained a lot of confidence and self reliance, made friends from all over the globe, among other equally important things.

 In the beginning, I only thought about the degree and the traveling that I would get to do. Then came the homesickness. Bouts of nostalgia knock me down every year but I always bounce back to the present. In addition, a lot of things didn't go according to plan and I found myself struggling like never before to simply face the day sometimes, but it has all been worth it. If I die today, I would go knowing that I truly lived. However, it's not my time to die yet, because after getting a taste of what life really has to offer, I want to see more and I have realized that it's all possible. So I am looking forward to the next journey already, even though this one hasn't really ended yet.

(Photographs are not the property of this blogger.)

Japan and the army

Japan is one of a few countries that does not have an army. Instead of an army, it has a self defence force which is able to protect in case it is attacked. However, it is not allowed to attack another country if it is not directly attacked. It is also seen as being less effective than an army.

With that being said, I have made quite an interesting observation. Japan may not be at as big a disadvantage as it may seem. The citizens of this country are very disciplined and if the need arises, I'm sure they would be able to form an army of millions in a heartbeat. 

Soldiers pride themselves on uniformity.

They even shave their heads for the sake of uniformity. In the same way, Japanese pride themselves on unity. It's hard to find an 'individual' in this society. Japanese grow up learning to put the community before self. If a Japanese makes a discovery while working in a company, the company takes credit for the discovery, not the individual. This issue recently came up with Shuji Nakamura, the man who patented the blue light technology. The company has been insisting that the invention was a result of team work and so one person should not hold the patent. However, he fought it in court for many years. He fought for his individuality which resulted in him copping the nobel prize in 2014. This case stood out because it is not the norm for company workers to patent inventions that they created within the company in Japan. Team spirit is always cherished above the individual. For an army, this is a great quality. 

They work together as a team and leave no man behind. Team spirit is at the core of a soldier's training. It is also at the core of the average Japanese's character. They are so much of a team that even children's school bags are supposed to be the same.  

They are usually precise in their craft and frivolous mistakes are not allowed. An Indonesian friend of mine once made a speech, in which he said he learnt at his Japanese University that mistakes were not ok. Everyone knows that it's best to strive for excellence, but Japanese strive for perfection in everything. It's kind of like OCD behaviour is encouraged. Children have to learn correct ways to close doors, sit, talk to each other, think. Yea, I said think. 

An army do as it's told, no questions asked. Once it is told to go to war, it goes. Many people operate like that here. If you ask why they do what they do they have to stop and think. Usually the answer is 'I don't know' or 'because that's what I'm supposed to do'. 

With these qualities, I think it wouldn't be too difficult to create a big, strong army quickly, if Japan decided to create an army.